Alain de Botton: How To Fall In Love Again

Begin Again with Davina McCall

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Thursday, 25 September 2025 - 1 hour 17 minutes

In this episode of Begin Again, philosopher and bestselling author Alain de Botton shares a deeply compassionate guide to repairing your love life and building a relationship with yourself that can last a lifetime.

He opens up about his early struggles with belonging, the emotional weight of childhood trauma, and the transformative lessons he’s learned through decades of studying human relationships. Through gentle wisdom and radical honesty, Alain unpacks what keeps us stuck in patterns of pain, why love so often goes wrong, and how we might begin again with ourselves and with each other.

From understanding victimhood and building emotional resilience, to facing regret and redefining success, this conversation invites you to rethink what it really means to live well.

With philosophical clarity and a therapist’s care, Alain de Botton offers a roadmap not just to falling in love again, but to becoming the person you’re proud to be.

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(Intro)

(00:01:37) Who Is Alain de Botton?

(00:02:37) Finding Inner Strength Through Love

(00:08:22) Healing Emotional Wounds From Childhood

(00:13:44) Letting Go of the Victim Mentality

(00:22:48) Choosing Love When Life Feels Hopeless

(00:26:27) Why Deep Friendships Matter in Adulthood

(00:29:38) The Fear of Love and 'The One'

(00:37:34) Adobe Ad

(00:38:42) Saying No and Discovering Your True Self

(00:46:32) Feeling Safe With Your Weirdest Self

(00:53:27) How to Find the Right Therapist

(00:57:29) Creating Space for Emotional Reflection

(01:00:49) Learning to Live With Regret

(01:04:31) Moving On With Emotional Scars

(01:08:28) Life Always Renews Itself With Love

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